One of the not-so-funny jokes of our marriage is that every time I go out of town without him, J falls or get sick. I go out of town without him - to conferences or whatever - a couple of times a year, and a couple of times a year he falls or gets really sick, so it could just be a coincidence, but really it happens at the same time far too often to be mere chance.
The day before I went to India for three weeks 6 or 7 years ago, he took the worst fall he'd had since I'd known him - fell backwards, and cracked his head on the sidewalk. That sucked, but the paramedics just sent him home with no stitches or anything and after a couple of days of bad headaches, he was ok.
Another memorable and horrible time, he fell right out of his wheelchair a little while before I, traveling with baby E 1300 miles away, called to ask his advice about whether I should take our very sick little son to the hospital. He answered the phone, "Help! Help! Help!" The men in his family have some kind of A Thing about calling 911, but I somehow convinced him that this was a situation in which an emergency call was warranted. * I was staying with my brother and sister-in-law and I'll never forget their faces as I hung up from that phone call. They were already dealing with quite a bit - a sick kid, a hysterical woman, the cancellation of our travel plans. Their eyes were, and I'm not being metaphorical here, as big as plates.
When J fell and broke his leg, just a few days before we moved to Portland last summer, I tried to joke with him about it "Oh honey, you don't have to hurt yourself, you're coming WITH me, remember?" Yeah, it wasn't all that funny at the time, either.
So, now E and I are getting ready to go to Florida for a few days to see E's grandpa - a long planned trip (and one reason I wont be cruising with the RevGals). And J has a pretty bad fever and cough. I heard myself say to my dad on skype tonight "I hope J doesn't get pneumonia or we'll have to cut our trip short." Which sounds like the most cold hearted wifely statement ever, but given the history, you can kind of get it, right? Right?
*The paramedics, by the way, arrived quickly and picked him right up and he wasn't hurt at all. He asked them about filling out the paper work and they were so cool, "Oh, no charge for helping you up. Just call us if you ever tip over again." So I guess we have the taxpayers of Washington to thank for that one.